Carey Portell’s next chapter

ST. JAMES, Mo. – A devastating 2010 car crash and a series of reconstructive surgeries spanning years reshaped cattle producer Carey Portell’s body and her future. Through the Missouri AgrAbility Project, Portell learned how to keep farming safely. And not only has she continued to farm, she has become an author, speaker and advocate. She speaks regularly at MU Extension’s annual Pearls of Production conference, delivering a keynote at this year’s event, which celebrated the International Year of the Woman Farmer.

When Portell first attended a Pearls of Production event more than 10 years ago, she wasn’t sure what she could still offer the world.

“It was a pivotal moment for my life,” she recalls. “Not just on the farm, but for me mentally to say, hey, I can actually still do something. And there are people out there who can help me to do it.”

It was at Pearls of Production that she learned about AgrAbility. Delivered by University of Missouri Extension in partnership with the Missouri Division of Vocational Rehabilitation, the program works with farmers and ranchers who have disabilities or long-term health conditions, helping them modify equipment, adapt daily tasks and reduce risk so they can remain productive. For Portell, that meant everything from safer cattle-handling strategies to specialized mobility equipment suited for rough terrain.

“Our goal is to keep farmers farming safely and productively by customizing solutions to their agricultural operation and tailoring adaptions to their individualized needs,” says Karen Funkenbusch, an MU Extension health and safety specialist and director of Missouri AgrAbility.

Over the years, Portell has gone from being a client to an advocate. “I just felt so much gratitude toward AgrAbility and how much passion they have to help people like me,” she says. “I told them I will be an advocate in any way that I possibly can.”

“Carey exemplifies what we see among many AgrAbility participants in Missouri,” Funkenbusch says. “Once barriers are removed, participants often become the most powerful advocates, motivating others to seek help.”

Portell is no longer speaking primarily as a farmer with disabilities, she says. Instead, she speaks as a woman farmer, addressing the physical and mental demands that women in agriculture carry every day.

“Being a woman farmer takes a lot more mental strength,” she says. “We’re not just taking care of our families and household chores. Those of us who are out there doing the farm work as well, we have to encompass all of it.”

Women, she notes, are often exceptionally good at caring for everyone else on the farm: spouses, children, employees, livestock. What they neglect is themselves.

Self-care, for Portell, is not optional.

“I have to be very self-conscious about it,” she says. “If I don’t, my life basically stops because my physical injuries won’t allow me to do things on a daily basis.”

Her circumstances make the lesson unavoidable, but she believes it applies broadly. “We need to be proactive about taking care of ourselves so that we can still take care of others and the farm work.”

A life built on routine

In 2015, Portell described herself as a 39-year-old living in a 76-year-old’s body, a line borrowed from her orthopedic surgeon. Now 50, she says it still fits.

“That’s what he said the inside of me looks like,” she says.

Portell’s collision with a drunk driver left her with a fused pelvis and severe damage to both legs. She would never regain the stamina she once had. She cannot build endurance the way she once did. Instead, every day is a careful rhythm of effort and recovery.

“I get up, I do stuff, and then I have to rest. Then I get up and do stuff, and then I have to rest,” she says. “My mind is still so ambitious, but my body just can’t keep up.”

The stakes are high. On uneven ground around cattle, pushing too far risks falls and new injuries. Managing energy is not about comfort; it is about safety.

Portell engineers her days to conserve strength.

“I had to learn from my surgeon and my physical therapist that in order to use the least amount of energy and the least amount of steps, I had to figure out a routine,” she says.

Each morning begins the same way: feeding cattle. When she comes inside, she props her feet up for about an hour. Later come computer work or household chores. Evening brings another round of feeding, often with her husband’s help, followed by dinner and household responsibilities.

“Some people would probably think it’s extremely boring to do the same thing every day,” she says. “But it’s just what I have to do.”

The routine is strategic. If she sticks to it, she knows what her body can handle. “If I don’t, the next couple of days are pretty rough.”

From client to mentor

Today, AgrAbility is included in every agriculture presentation she gives. Through social media and speaking engagements across Missouri, she shares practical advice and encourages others facing injury or disability. She also told her story in her 2021 book, “Facing Life Head On: Healing With Courage, Gratitude, and Attitude.”

“Just because you have some kind of physical challenge, you can still live a very fulfilling life,” she says. “You just have to accept the changes you have to make.”

The crash changed her in less visible ways, too.

Before, she describes herself as intensely physical and fiercely independent. Now, every task requires calculation: Is it safe? Is there a smarter way to do it? Can equipment do what muscle once did?

She also speaks more openly.

“I felt deeply before my car crash, but I was a very private person,” she says. “Now I don’t hold anything back.”

Back in the saddle

After the crash, she asked doctors whether she would ever ride horses again. With injuries to her pelvis and both lower legs, they could not promise anything. They were skeptical she would walk well, much less ride.

Now, on warm Sundays, she and her husband saddle up.

She needs help mounting. An adaptive apparatus allows her to secure herself safely in the saddle. She rides one particular horse: Jack, a calm, shorter horse she trusts.

A former equine physical therapist once told her that a horse’s stride could help her pelvis move in a way that mimics walking. The first time she climbed back into the saddle and let Jack move beneath her, it was a milestone for her entire family.

“My mind and spirit need it,” she says.

Much has changed since that first Pearls conference in 2014. Her children are grown. Her body demands even more mindfulness. But the farm remains: cattle to feed, calves to tag, gates to open.

And the woman who once wondered what she could still offer now stands before other women farmers to remind them of their strength, and their limits.

Strength, she has learned, is not pushing until you collapse.

It is knowing when to rest so you can rise again tomorrow.

Learn more

• Missouri AgrAbility. A partnership that helps farmers with disabilities remain independent through education and on-the-farm assistance.
• Show-Me Strong Farm Families. Resources addressing mental health crises in rural areas.
• Pearls of Production. Pearls of Production connects agricultural professionals, researchers and producers through engaging conversations and hands-on, practical trainings.
• Carey Portell website.