But in recent years, the rights of grandparents have been complicated by issues of divorce, parental custody and the increasing number of children who are born to unmarried parents. Sadly, what often happens is that the parents of the non-custodial parent get to see their grandchildren little or not at all.

     The best approach for grandparents is to attempt to find a resolution without a court visit Try these tips:

n If the grandchild’s parents are getting a divorce or separating, ask them to include visitation for you in the divorce or custody agreement.

n If your relationship with the parents has been difficult, try and work out a compromise for the sake of the grandchildren.

n Seek a trained mediator. Much less expensive than a lawyer, these experts help families find a middle ground.

n Don't put your children in the middle with negative remarks about their parents.

n Keep in touch with your grandchildren with cards, telephone calls or e-mail. Keep a log of these contacts in case you have to prove an established relationship.

     If none of these tips work, there is still hope. In all 50 states, grandparents have certain visitation rights—but how extensive or limited depends on the state.