April 2001

 

Give Yourself a Break!
Kathy Dothage, dothagem@missouri.edu

It doesn't take long for a family caregiver to realize that the round-the-clock care and constant supervision of a loved one soon results in feelings of exhaustion and may even lead to "caregiver burn out."

Even though you probably have heard about the concept of "respite," you may have felt ambivalent about leaving your family member under someone else's care and supervision. Then, as more time passes, you realize that if you don't schedule some breaks for yourself, your own health will begin to suffer. It's time to give yourself a break!

So what does respite mean? Respite means relief. For family caregivers, respite means relief from providing constant care. It means some valued time off to focus on your own needs. And it's so important to schedule regular breaks - you need to allow the time to attend to your own care and well-being, so you don't exhaust yourself physically and emotionally. When you think about having some time off from care giving, what comes to mind? Would you give anything for some quiet time at home or would you love to get out, visit friends, run errands, shop, have lunch out or see a matinee?

As you think about what you are most comfortable doing with this new concept called free time, you also will consider the preferences and capabilities of the person you are caring for, and the type of respite best suited to each of you.

If the person you care for is a social person, he or she might enjoy spending time out with a companion, or in some group activities at an adult day care center, allowing you some quiet solitude at home. Adult day care centers are different - some provide health care and rehabilitation therapies, some are designed especially for people with dementia, and others are developed to create a social program for older adults to share activities. These centers provide a range of services, including supervision, social and recreational activities designed for the functional capabilities of the participants. Hours of operation can be full-or part-time and some centers provide their own transportation. Costs vary, depending on type of program, but sliding scales are often offered.

In-home respite care can be provided by home health aides or certified nursing assistants, who can be hired through a home care agency listed in the yellow pages. There are also experienced and well-trained home care attendants that are available to be hired privately.

If you are comfortable doing your own hiring and supervision, you can save the overhead costs of an agency and get more hours of assistance for you money. Some communities have local attendant registries that will refer you to individuals who are looking for home care work. However, it is crucial that you first do your own screening over the telephone, an in-person interview (preferably with another person present to give a second opinion), and last but not least, call references. Don't underestimate the value of work-related references.

Home care attendants usually prefer to work in four- to eight-hour shifts, but some are willing to do morning and evening "tuck-in" services as well. They have a range of skills, which can be evaluated according to the needs of our loved one.

For more information checkout http://iml.umkc.edu/casww and www.caregiver.org on the internet.

Source: Family Caregiver Alliance Update Summer 2000.